Barky McTreeface Announces Run For Boson City Council - "I'm a voice from the back woods" - You Know Where I Stand


BOSON, MA—In a speech delivered to supporters addressing the begining of his city council campaign, Barky McTreeface announced Thursday that there was “no need to worry,” because he would always be here to fight climate change. In the past he had ethereally transformed into a majestic oak.

“Although today marks the beginning of my 2020 city council bid, I want all of you to know that my wisdom will forever be in the soil of this magnificent grove and my hope will be in the sky above,” said McTreeface at a press conference held deep in the East Blue Hills Reserve as he seemed to vanished in a bath of warm light, only to reappear moments later in the guise of an ancient white oak lit by luminous bands of fireflies, his arms transforming into long, twisting branches while his voice echoed through the millennia-old thicket as if by the enchantment of nature itself.

“Whenever you need my guidance to help fight for the future of our planet, just come to this wooded spot and listen for the whisper of the wind between these branches and the dappling of light upon theses leaves. There you will hear my voice. There you will see my spirit.”

At press time, Barky McTreeface was being doused with buckets of water from a nearby stream as he was in danger of being burned alive in a blaze caused by a poorly maintained fire pit some nature lovers had left unattended. Several campaign signs were lost to the blaze, and all of McTreeface's signed nomination papers.

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