All Space Rockets Launched in Massachusetts Must Be Wind Powered - Boson Airport Readies Windy Lift-Off Pad

 


(AP) —Massachusetts has announced a bold new initiative: all rockets produced or launched in the state must run on wind power just ten years from now.

Governor Charles Duane Baker Junior claimed the executive order was guided by SCIENCE and MATH.

"We are following the SCIENCE here!" Baker said. "We are once again leading the nation with initiatives that other states are too slow to initiate.  Republicans and others who deny science in states like Texas and Florida say they are pro-business because they have primitive technology like electricity, gasoline, and cars, but really, they just want the world to burn."

"With SCIENCE on our side, we can go where no man has gone before, fully powered by green energy like wind and solar."

Early wind rockets have been unsuccessful, as the first one just fell over and then blew into Quincy from the launch at the top of the East Blue Hills.  A rocket launched near the coast got stuck in a large tree and the fire department was called to help get it down. 

Governor Baker is confident the technology will be ready in a decade.  Governor Baker revealed that Massachusetts had offered Elon Musk - the Government Subsidy Genius - billions if he moved his Space X operation to the Commonwealth instead of the more conservative libertarian Texas.  

"That outreach is gone with the wind," Governor Baker said sadly.  The governor likes the press and media to call him 'Charlie.'  This reporter is not doing that, Charles.  




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